Dear giant floating parking lot salespeople: Stop trying to make an aquatic garage on the Toronto waterfront happen. It's not going to happen.

This much has been made crystal clear by city councillors, provincial MPPs, federal MPs and City of Toronto Chief Planner Gregg Lintern in recent years by way of multiple rejected proposals. 

And yet, pitches for what city planning staff call "a floating parking garage in the Portland Street slip at the foot of Dan Leckie Way just east of Bathurst Street and Queens Quay West" continue to surface.

A number of months ago I heard some talk of a floating parking lot for Toronto’s waterfront.

I thought it was a joke.

Today I received a document of the proposal. It is marked confidential.

These idiots just never stop.#Topoli #cdnpoli pic.twitter.com/FipFoj9XIF

— Jim Panou (@jpanimages) August 15, 2019

Toronto photographer Jim Panou shared screenshots on Twitter this week from a document containing plans for one monstrous-looking "floating structure" next to the historic Canada Malting silos.

It is not clear who is proposing to build the parking garage, only that they are persistent.

"Various iterations of the proposal have been presented to City staff and elected officials in recent years," reads a February 2019 rejection letter addressed to a "Mr. Newlands" from Toronto and East York Community Planning Director Lynda Macdonald.

"The original proposal presented to staff in April 2015 identified a floating parking structure... that would be approximately 120 feet in width by 600 feet in length, and three storeys in height," the letter continues. "Gregg Lintern, Chief Planner, responded at the time that city planning staff were not in support of the proposal."

I do love the response from City Planning. pic.twitter.com/89NJwgSR1j

— Jim Panou (@jpanimages) August 16, 2019

And yet, in January of this year, the city received yet another unsolicited proposal for the Portland Slip parking garage, as well one for another floating garage "potentially in the vicinity of Ontario Place."

Each floating structure would be designed to accommodate a minimum of 800 plus vehicles and include "possible green space and community-focused uses," according to Macdonald's letter.

The people of Toronto weren't on board then, they aren't on board now, and it's unlikely that they ever will be, judging by reaction to Panou's tweet.

Waterfront Toronto just completed a revitalization of Queens Quay, which created space for people to bike, walk, and just enjoy the waterfront.

Placing a huge barge in the way of that is just insulting. https://t.co/nDkW6zs6dp

— Trevor Heywood (@hey_trev) August 16, 2019

"Not on my watch," tweeted Spadina-Fort York MP Adam Vaughan in response to the screenshots.

"I can't count the number of ways this is wrong," replied Spadina-Fort York MPP Chris Glover.

"But let's start with: We are so fortunate to live in one of the great waterfront cities in the world. Let's not clog the lake with parked cars."