Someone in Toronto selling Goldfish cracker they think looks like the Pope for $1000
Move over potato chips and slices of toast that look like Jesus, because there's a new holy figure-shaped snack food that's been found right here in Toronto.
A Facebook Marketplace post advertises a Goldfish cracker vaguely shaped like a Catholic Pope blessing a fish for sale in Toronto for the completely bonkers price of $995.
According to seller Stephen Alexander, the "one-of-a-kind" snack was found in a bag of Cheese Trio Goldfish crackers fused as a single piece, saying, "I clearly see a pope blessing a fish."
It seems like an entirely ridiculous ask for a malformed clump of cracker dough, but Alexander wouldn't be the first to fetch such a high price for a bite of food bearing (and I feel like I'm being generous here) the appearance of a holy figure.
"Food like this can sell for a lot," writes a confident Alexander in his sales pitch. "There is the classic Jesus toast that sold for 20k+ and a Cheeto that looked like Harambe which sold for 100k."
Alexander insists that the papal cracker is "100 per cent real" with "no alterations," and stresses that jokes at the expense of the holy salted snack are not welcome.
"If you think you are being funny by sending a joke, I can promise you are not being original or funny. The joke is stale, unlike this cracker, which I have sealed in a plastic bag since I found it."
Stephen Alexander/Facebook | dcwcreations/Shutterstock.com
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