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Events on Toronto's Radar for SATURDAY SEPTEMBER 5 and SUNDAY SEPTEMBER 6, 2009... lovingly handpicked from blogTO's events calendar.

Saturday, September 5

MUSIC | Bite Your Tongue 1: Final Fantasy, Gowns, Huckleberry Friends
Some of Toronto's best bands want to take you on a magical adventure this weekend to a secret location. No one but people who have already bought tickets actually know where this show is taking place, but it's apparently somewhere near a strip mall 70 min from downtown. Get your tickets at Rotate This or Soundscapes, and hopefully some one there will draw you a map or something.
Location Unknown, $10, 7 pm

AIR SHOW | Canadian International Air Show
Unless you've been under your bed with your fingers stuck in your ears, you've probably noticed the millions of dollars worth of military hardware flying around the city for the past few days. Those are just the practice flights for the main event this weekend, when Torontonians will be treated to aerobatic displays from performers such as the Horseman, bi-plane pilot Mike Wiskus, the US Navy Blue Angels, and of course the Snowbirds as part of the CNE's closing weekend. Keep watching the skies!
Exhibition Grounds, 210 Princes' Blvd., $15

FOOD | Hot and Spicy Food Festival
There's plenty to do at the Harbourfront Centre's Spicy Food Festival this weekend. Some of the city's top chefs will be cooking up 10 Foods To Try Before You Die, there'll be a Red Hot Marketplace where you can purchase some of the world's hottest spices, and Circus Alchemy will be performing some flammable circus acts. In perhaps the hottest event of all, three fire fighter models from the Toronto Fire Fighter Calendar will turn chef and fire up the grill. Some highlights on the menu: mini tuna wasabi burgers, spicy hot tamale, and curry chicken poutine. Goes all weekend.
Harbourfront Centre, 235 Queen's Quay West, 10 am to 12 pm on the weekend, 10 am to 5 pm on Monday

COMEDY | Don't You Forget About John Hughes
We all loved John Hughes, even if we didn't know it. Before his untimely death last month, many of us may not have realized he was behind some of our most beloved movies. Saturday night some of the city's best improv talent are honouring Hughes by reenacting three of his best films: Ferris Bueller's Day Off, Planes Trains and Automobiles, and the Breakfast Club.
Comedy Bar, 945 Bloor St. W., $12 for one show, $25 for all three, 8 pm

LECTURE | Ayurveda and Yoga: Lunch and Lecture with Dr. Robert Svoboda
Ever since Lululemon started selling pants that make anyone's ass look fabulous, everyone and their sister has been practicing yoga. But the Western revival of the ancient art has faced some criticism because it's utterly devoid of the spiritual aspects that it originally entailed. Dr. Svoboda is an expert in aryurveda ("the science of life"), and will lecture today about how aryurveda can be combined with yoga to achieve equipose in every facet of our existence. There's also a vegetarian buffet.
Govinda's Vegetarian Club, 243 Avenue Rd., $40, 2 pm

PARTY | Goin' Steady
Goin' Steady has been an institution since it started in 2006. Slinging tunes from the 50s and 60s, the djs at this semi-monthly party always keep the dancefloor packed with doowop, motown, country boogie, rocakbilly and early rock n' roll hits. With cheap drinks and only a $5 cover, it's no wonder there's always a line.
The Boat, 158 Augusta Ave., $5, 10 pm

CRUISE | Mariposa Air Show Lunch Cruises
All this weekend the Mariposa cruise line is offering a perfect seafaring view of the CNE's air show from the decks of its old-fashioned river boat the Mariposa Belle. The jets are so loud you won't be able to get away from them this weekend so you might as well enjoy the show in style. Ticket price includes a fancy lunch buffet and a 4-hour cruise of the harbour. Goes til Monday.
Mariposa Cruises, 207 Queen's Quay W., $58.95, 12 pm to 4:30 pm

MUSIC | Hi-Hat Launch Night
Hi-Hat Recordings continues its two-night takeover of Rancho Relaxo with another showcase of up and coming talent. The fledgling label is releasing a compilation CD of bands from across the country this weekend and is bringing many of its 17 contributors to the stage Saturday. Headliners Cut Throat Britva play a mix of quirky hard rock a la Queens of the Stone Age, and the Job have a reputation for high-energy, occasionally destructive live shows
Rancho Relaxo, 300 College St., $7, 9 pm

Sunday, September 6

MUSIC | 30 Years Of (Owen Pallett's Birthday Bash)
Owen Pallett is keeping busy this weekend. Fresh off a secret-location show in the boondocks of the GTA on Saturday, he's throwing himself a 30th birthday party on Sunday that includes 29 bands on two stages at the Lula Lounge. Gentleman Reg, Dan Werb, $100, Picastros, Kids on TV, Brides, Slim Twig, the Phonemes, Diamond Rings and tons more all get in on the action for a marathon 11 hour show. Don't miss it.
Lula Lounge, 1585 Dundas St. W., PWYC, Doors at 3:30 pm

COMMUNITY | Promise Cherry Beach Double Dip Afternoon Sound System
Cherry Beach will be filled with friends and friends of friends this weekend as the people at Promise throw the last Afternoon Soundsystem party of the Summer. The Cherry Beach parties have a fun lazy Sunday vibe, with people throwing frisbees, lighting bonfires and playing with dogs. There's also some great music from local DJs, and this weekend Promise is doubling up on the fun by throwing an extra party on Labour Day Monday as well.
Cherry Beach, Free, 3 pm to 10 pm

PARTY | Girl & Boy 90s Party
It's only a couple of months until we close the books on another decade, which means the time is just about right to start celebrating the one that came before it . For better or for worse, nineties retro parties are gonna be big in the next few years and Clinton's is keeping up with the times tonight by pretending it's twenty years ago. Expect a mishmash of 90s hits from artists including Blackstreet, Pulp, and probably Bone Thugz and Harmony. There's even a rumour the Thong Song will be dusted off. Not for the faint of heart.
Clinton's, 693 Bloor St. W., $5, 9 pm

LECTURE | The Hermetic Code
Professor Frank Albo has a theory: the Manitoba legislative building in Winnipeg was in fact built by an underground society to serve as an architectural talisman of occult magical power. Sounds crazy doesn't it, but this guy has a degree from Cambridge University. On Sunday Albo will be lecturing on his discovery of Masonic and occult symbols imbedded in the building's architecture, which he says prove the seat of provincial government is in fact a Masonic temple. Not so far fetched when you consider our own Old City Hall is rife with Masonic symbols.
Conspiracy Culture, 1696 Queen St. W., $10, 6:30 pm

PARTY | The Beach Ball
The city workers strike screwed up a lot of things this summer. But the folks behind Beach Bash weren't about to let it spoil their party, so when all the beaches closed during Pride Week they just rescheduled the city's biggest gay beach bash to Labour Day weekend. The forecast is good so expect plenty of sun, tons of music, and bars right on the sand. Probably a bit of nudity too (it's a clothing optional beach). A hot and summery way to end a very unseasonable summer.
Hanlan's Point Beach, Toronto Island, 12 pm - 8 pm

BRUNCH | The High Tea Series at the Royal York
Social networking group Eventbrite brings you this chance to take high tea at Toronto's most prestigious hotel. A delicious menu has been prepared by the hotel's swanky Epic Restaurant, including Nova Scotia lobster sandwiches and white chocolate and honey Madelines. After the meal you'll have a chance to tour the historic rooftop gardens of the hotel.
Fairmont Royal York, 100 Front St. W., $40, 12:30 pm

Continuing Events:

EXHIBITION | Canadian National Exhibition
Going to the CNE on Labour Day Weekend is always bittersweet. Sure it's fun, but it's a painful reminder that summer is almost over. Walking through the midway at Canada's largest fair is something of a rite of passage for all Torontonians, and as always this year's exhibition has a wide variety of entertainment including a casino, a working farm, and rides for the kiddies. This is your last chance until next year!
Exhibition Grounds, 210 Princes' Blvd., $11 and up

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